BABYSITTERS/NANNIES/FULL-TIME HELP

Finding a domestic helper

Word-of-mouth is often the way expat women find helpers to look after their babies, as tried-and-tested helpers who come highly recommended by their employers are in demand. Advertisements are sometimes placed by employers on behalf of their helpers or by the domestic helpers themselves on noticeboards in supermarkets or websites (such as www.asiaxpat.com.hk/domestichelp/). You can also use an online domestic helper search service, such as www.amahnet.com, which lists regulatory information and provides links to the Labour Department. Domestic helpers preferred by expats are often from the Philippines or Sri Lanka, as their English language skills are generally better than their Indonesian counterparts.

Helpful advice for managing your helper is contained in Julie Jacobson’s Helper’s Helper. The YWCA also runs classes on subjects such as cooking, first aid and kitchen hygiene for helpers. Communication issues can sometimes arise, complicating the relationship between a helper and her employer. Employers recommend that the person who will be dealing with the helper should be the one to hire her, rather than the husband deciding who to hire and leaving his wife to manage the helper.

Mother of two, Kavita Jindal, comments:

One of the things I didn’t realize is that Filipino helpers who were qualified midwives in the Philippines and have experience of looking after children or working with other expat families expect to be offered more than the minimum wage. I couldn’t understand why, after shortlisting helpers, interviewing them and then finding a suitable one and offering them work, they never called back. It’s definitely worth offering more money to get a good helper.

Full-time help

There’s very little free help available to expat mothers in Hong Kong. Even at play areas in public sports centres, you will have to pay for the use of the space and toys, and mind your kids both there and at a residents’ club. The exception are play rooms provided by the Leisure and Cultural Services Department (www.lcsd.gov.hk/en/ls_fac_playroom.php). It’s very difficult just to leave your child with someone while you go for a swim. So many expat families, like local Cantonese families, opt to pay for full-time help. Usually they live in, although some helpers prefer to live out.

At the end of 2005, there were 223,394 foreign domestic helpers (FDHs) in Hong Kong, of whom over 53% came from the Philippines, 43% from Indonesia and 2% from Thailand. Currently, FDHs – variously called amahs, helpers, maids or nannies – earn a minimum wage of $3,320 a month for a six-day working week. A government levy of $400 a month for each FDH is imposed on top of this. The employer is responsible for providing accommodation and paying the domestic worker’s health insurance, airline tickets and other costs incurred during the contract period – including pregnancy.

Many women resist getting a full-time helper in because of fears of sharing the house with a stranger, worries about theft or feelings of guilt. An argument also runs, of course, that you are providing a job to someone who can then support a family back home.

However, most women find the benefits far outweigh the disadvantages. Sue Dockstader, a British lawyer married to an American, lived in Hong Kong for over ten years – first as a single, then as a mother of two young children. She observes that ‘the big difference I find to the States [where she had her kids before coming to Hong Kong] is here you can have a life, because you have a helper’. Ferrying your children round Hong Kong and even going shopping can be difficult, because of crowds, split-level shops with steps and escalators, supermarket aisles that aren’t wide enough to manoeuvre strollers easily and car parks far from shops.

Even after children grow up and a helper is no longer needed for child-minding, there’s still the cleaning, washing and cooking to do, and many find the convenience just too great to give up. According to Sharon Glick, a director of St John’s Counselling Service, some expat women refuse point blank to leave Hong Kong, even if their husbands have lost their jobs, because they don’t want to get by without a helper. However, plenty of single friends of mine, and some married friends, do not have one.

Part-time help

Although it’s illegal to hire an FDH part-time, in practice many people do, paying a friend’s amah for a few hours’ cleaning per week or babysitting. Companies such as Merry Maids (www.merrymaids.com.hk) or Home Easy (www.homeasy.com; tel. 2776 2900) can supply part-time cleaning and domestic help, or you may be able to find a local Chinese cleaner – rates usually start at $50 per hour.

Part- and full-time babysitting and nannying can be found at the expatriaterun Rent-A-Mum (12A Amber Lodge, 21–25 Hollywood Road; tel. 2523 4868) and Mums R Us (17B, Valley View Terrace, 68 Blue Pool Road, Happy Valley; tel. 2805 7559). Prices are roughly $100–130 per hour.

ADOPTING A CHILD

Adoption in Hong Kong is organized through the Social Welfare Department. Hong Kong residents can submit applications for adoption through the Adoption Unit office (4/F, Harbour Building, 38 Pier Road, Central, Hong Kong; tel. 2852 3107).

Prospective single or married adopters will need to be at least 25, prove that they are mature and healthy, have no criminal record, have an income sufficient to support a child and are eligible to stay in Hong Kong for a continuous period of 12 months. Couples should be able to show evidence of a stable marriage. Single expat women as well as expat couples have successfully adopted local children, including those past babyhood – especially special needs children.Mother’s Choice, an organization providing foster care for babies and advice for pregnant women, gives an overview of the adoption and fostering process in Hong Kong, as well as details of support groups for adopting families, on its website, www.mchoice.org.

REGISTERING YOUR BABY’S BIRTH AND OBTAINING A PASSPORT

For UK citizens, a local Hong Kong birth certificate is sufficient for most purposes, including British passport applications. For a fee, you can register the birth of your child with the British Consulate, who then provide your child with a British-style birth certificate.

In any case, you must register your child with the Hong Kong government. Registration and birth certificate forms are available for downloading on the Immigration Department’s website, www.immd.gov.hk/ehtml/birth_1.htm. BNO and British citizen passports can be obtained by following the procedures outlined on the British Consulate’s website (www.britishconsulate.org.hk). A similar process is necessary for other foreign nationals. Contact details of consulates are provided in Appendix 3.