CRITICS

Don’t confuse advertorials with critics. The former is part of the advertising process with a staff member of the newspaper writing a glowing report of your restaurant. The latter is an unsolicited reviewer of your restaurant who will come unannounced and unbidden.

If you believe in your restaurant then you will welcome a critic, but only one who understands the restaurant business, rather than a celebrity reviewer who may be simply out for him or herself with little knowledge, understanding or interest. These reviewers are usually attention-seeking and have little respect within the restaurant industry. Restaurants generally deserve much better than the reviews these people give.

Critics can be vicious but can equally heap praise on where praise is due. I have been a restaurant critic and restaurant inspector for a number of years and, beforehand, chef and restaurant owner.

Not all critics need to have this background, of course, but it is immensely useful to have been steeped in the business before taking up the critical pen. There are critics who rightly see it from the point of view of the restaurant diner and recognise a restaurant which is giving a raw deal to its customers – or the exact opposite.

Some restaurateurs grumble – after a poor review – that the critic is not an ordinary customer. Granted, there are critics who set preposterous standards of excellence when reviewing a restaurant which has no pretensions, the establishment preferring to offer simpler fare in less ostentatious surroundings. He or she is not doing their job fairly or properly.

What critics look for

Criticism must be based on the food, sourcing of produce, the kitchen’s skills, front of house staff, the degree of care and attention shown to the customer and the degree of comfort (at least a decent chair to sit on rather than one that cuts into the backs of your legs).

It is not purely the food the critic has to focus on, however, but also the feel of the restaurant and if the experience was a successful, enjoyable one. Is hospitality offered? Creativity? Innovation? Maybe a theatrical buzz?

Criticism is useless unless the writer can give reasons as to why the food, atmosphere or service was poor. It is simply not good enough to say, ‘I didn’t like my pork belly with pak choi.’ Why not? Was it tough, too salty, the meat poorly sourced, the vegetable wildly overcooked? A critic owes it to the restaurant to explain why.

Critics do have the power to close a business. Their judgement can be that tough on businesses – the ultimate coup de grace. I derive no pleasure from it. But some restaurateurs are simply not cut out to be in the business and do unutterable damage to the reputation of the industry. Time to pack up and find another, more fulfilling, suitable profession rather than foisting poor food and service on the public.

Responding to reviews

On the positive side, a good critique of a restaurant can create boom time, the phone ringing non-stop for bookings. If this happens to you, give the critic a call or write. It is always appreciated.

There will always be times in the life of a restaurant when not everything runs smoothly: your chef burns a hand, a staff member hasn’t removed the lipstick from a just-washed glass, late produce delivery means too little time to prep properly. You will just have to accept the negative press reaction should the critic be in that evening. But it is simply no good relying on ’chef’s night off’ as an excuse. If the chef was off, the deputy has to achieve the same standards. Or close the restaurant that day/evening.

But, if your restaurant has little in the way of commendation and is purely PR hype without substance and you get a real roasting, then it’s time to re-evaluate your goals.

National critics respected by most restaurateurs and the public alike include Fay Maschler (London Evening Standard) and Jay Rayner (Observer). They know their onions and can deliver some pretty savage blows as well as praise when it’s due. The ones not to take seriously include Michael Winner (Sunday Times). Be very wary of approaching AA Gill (Sunday Times) and Victor Lewis-Smith (Guardian). They are the rottweilers of the business and have declared open season, seeing restaurants and chefs as personal fair game.

Approaching critics

If you do approach any restaurant critic with information about your restaurant in the hope that you will get a write-up, make sure you do so with your eyes wide open. It is a long shot that your restaurant will be chosen for a write-up by national papers, however. Many of these critics stay firmly in town, only venturing outside London occasionally during their 52 or less weeks of the year’s reviewing.

However, regional newspapers that have such a column welcome any reports of a new restaurant opening or change of chef and, if they are worth their salt, will do an anonymous write-up rather than accept an invitation to be your guest. I am always very pleased to know of changes in my area of Hampshire and West Sussex and will put names on my list of restaurants to review. But I will never go as a guest as it could be seen as compromising my objectivity.