AVAILABILITY AND CHARGES

Mediation services are provided by organisations such as

• the Family Mediation Service
• NCH – the children’s charity
• other local children’s charities.

See ‘Useful Contacts’ at the back of the book for more details.

These organisations are neutral and can be used outside of court. If you can get your ex-partner to agree to use a mediator, then both of you can go along to the service and start the process. However this will cost you money as only court-appointed mediation is free of charge.

The charges are typically based on your earnings and are a sliding scale. Compared with the alternative, which is having a solicitor represent you at court (and all the time and stress that goes with it) it’s probably quicker and cheaper to get an agreement via mediation.

If you can persuade your ex-partner to participate in a mediation service, you give yourself a chance of getting a solution to your problems over contact/access in the quickest possible manner. As it is done in a neutral way as well, your ex is more likely to stick to whatever agreement the mediator can negotiate.

If divorced dads who end up going to court could turn the clock back on their own court battles then they would instigate a mediation service at the outset, as it can resolve matters prior to things becoming even more polarised at the court. But it is important to recognise that mediation does not work in all circumstances, and in cases where mother is resolute that she will not openly and freely discuss matters, and respect the opinions of either the negotiator or the divorced dad, then mediation will fail. In these circumstances, the only option left to the father is to obtain a court order.