A child refusing to go to school is a problem that many parents encounter at some point.  Children just refuse to go to school – and around 33% of those school refusers never return to school.

What can you do when your child refuses to go to school?  Force them?  This can be hard if you have to forcibly dress a child and have them screaming and crying as you take them through the school gates.  It can make life very stressful and uncomfortable for everyone concerned – child, parent and teachers. With older children, they may simply become truants – and you could find yourself in court as a result.

The most common times this problem occurs are when a child is aged 5, 11 and 14. 

The first thing to do is find out why a child does not want to go to school.  Sit down and talk to your child.  There can be many reasons – perhaps the child is not feeling well, or something has upset them.  They may be frightened.  This is particularly common when a child has either just started school or moved to a new school. Lack of friends or just the sheer size of a school can be very daunting for a child.  Tensions at home such as a parent losing a job or the arrival of a new baby can trigger school refusal. They may have seen a distressing story on the news such as gunmen in a school.

It may be all that is needed is reassurance and a little bit of help making friends.

There may be more serious causes such as bullying or a total dislike of school.  Check out the days on which it is happening – there may be a pattern emerging.  It may be that they do not want to do a particular activity such as physical education; dislike a subject or are beginning to struggle academically.  This can result in the child becoming physically ill at the mere thought of going to school and showing signs of stress, such as nausea and headaches.

At this stage, talking to the class teacher and head teacher is a priority.  For example, the school may have a policy on bullying which will enable the situation to be dealt with, or additional help can be given with schoolwork. It may be that the child needs a little space and time to get over a major problem. The school will be willing to help as far as it can, as long as it knows what the problem is.

Ultimately there is the option of home education. This is not an easy option, since you will need to take responsibility for the child’s education on a day-to-day basis, but for some children, this is the only solution.

This content was provided by one of our users, pinewoodlodge