112 Consider:

• Do you believe in yourself?
• Do you have faith in your abilities?
• How much do you believe in yourself? Rate yourself on a scale of zero to ten (where zero means ‘not at all’ and ten means ‘totally and completely’). If less than ten, why do you think that is?
• Do you believe you create your own circumstances? Or that life is something that happens to you?

113 Do you believe absolutely and with no doubt that you have the ability to accomplish your goals? All of them?

If not, take a pen and paper and make a few notes on how your life would be different if you really believed in yourself.

Never forget, when you believe in yourself, anything is possible.

114 What are beliefs? A belief is any collection of thoughts or ideas that you accept as true. Your beliefs are feelings of certainty about something.

Many of our beliefs are never questioned, yet form the basis of how we live our lives. The strongest beliefs usually concern ‘the way it is’, religion and other moral values such as respect for law and order, one’s country and family responsibilities.

In which areas of your life do you hold the strongest beliefs?

115 Where do beliefs come from? Beliefs are learned; initially you acquired them from the people who raised you and those you grew up with, especially your parents, siblings, teachers and peer group. As you matured, you acquired more knowledge and began to interpret your experiences for yourself. All this had a powerful effect.

Beliefs are stored in the subconscious and constantly influence you. You normally think and act in accordance with your beliefs. When you don’t, you feel profoundly uncomfortable.

Of course, some beliefs are more credible than others, but many are nothing more than unsubstantiated prejudices which have built up over the years and have little or no evidence to support them. A person whose parents repeatedly told them they’re no good and will never amount to anything, for instance, is unlikely to have high self-esteem. Some of those who suffered from such comments manage to ignore them, but most can’t. They are so ingrained in their subconscious that these poor souls live well below their true potential.

Whatever your experiences as a child, as an adult you can choose at any time to reject a discredited belief and believe something new, something different. You can consciously and deliberately create new beliefs; you can also change a belief you no longer want. Since beliefs are learned, and anything which is learned and can be unlearned and relearned, with a little determination you can replace any belief with a more empowering one. Then, as soon as you make the change and it is accepted by your subconscious, all the incoming evidence supports your new belief.

The hardest thing about changing a belief, ironically, is believing it’s possible. People usually see their current beliefs as hard facts, how things are, unalterable. Some even think it commendable to die for their beliefs (and murder others in the process).

Think of someone you know, have read about or seen on film or TV who changed a belief about themselves. What effect did it have on their lives?

116 If you want evidence of how influential a belief can be, consider placebos – pills and potions containing no active ingredients. In healing, beliefs can be crucial to recovery because they deliver a direct command to the immune system. Author Norman Cousins (who cured himself of a terminal illness after doctors had given up on him) wrote, ‘Drugs are not always necessary. Belief in recovery always is.’

Patients who are given placebos often make a full recovery. In her book Positive Thinking, Vera Peiffer gives two remarkable examples:

• When an antidepressant drug was tested experimentally, group A showed a success rate of 70 per cent, but those in group B, who had received a placebo, also showed a 70 per cent success rate. This is not unusual: there are literally thousands of well documented examples ranging from headache relief to cures for cancer, insomnia and heart disease.
• Even more incredible is the case of a convicted murderer in the United States who chose to have his wrists cut rather than go to the electric chair. The prisoner was blindfolded, and strapped to a chair. A warden traced across his wrists with a feather. He died instantly.

117 To what extent do your beliefs contribute to your happiness, contentment and wellbeing?

118 Ask yourself: what one, two or three things could I believe right now that would take me closer to my achieving my goal(s)?

119 One of the most inspiring examples of an individual who challenged traditional beliefs is Roger Bannister. Before he ran the world’s first sub four minute mile in 1954, the conventional wisdom was that human beings were not meant to run at this speed – the heart would burst under the strain. Then, with this belief shown up as false, within a year 37 other runners had done it too, followed within three years by another 300. Now thousands have run a sub four minute mile with no long term ill effects.

Note: dozens of athletes could have done what Bannister did; they were just as capable physically. Only their beliefs held them back.

120 Before you can get rid of your limiting beliefs, you must become aware of their existence. As they are largely subconscious, this is often easier said than done.

The most damaging belief is that you are the way you are, it is fixed and cannot change. But the most important attributes of successful people – confidence, a positive attitude, courage and determination and so on – are learned through experience.

Write down six limiting beliefs about yourself in the left hand column below, such as I’m too shy, I’m over the hill, it’s too late to change, I’m not clever enough, I’m too hard on myself, etc. If there isn’t enough room, continue on a separate sheet.

Then write in the right hand column what you would like to believe instead of these disempowering beliefs.

121 Write down six beliefs about other people that you would like to change in the left hand column below, e.g. people are mostly selfish, they’re only out for themselves, you only get rich by being mean, most people are better than me, etc.

Now write down what you would like to believe instead in the right hand column. By all means continue on a separate sheet if six isn’t enough.

122 Write in the left hand column below six beliefs about the world in general and how life is that you would like to change, e.g. life is hard, if you want something you’ve got to fight for it, we’re not here to be happy, you have to be ruthless to succeed, etc, etc.

Now write in the right hand column what you would like to believe instead. (Continue on a separate sheet if six isn’t enough.)

You now have plenty of material to work on in the next few pages.

123 One way to change a belief is to use a technique known as disputing. Disputing involves examining a belief in detail, pulling it apart, looking for evidence and challenging it using questions such as:

• Is it true?
• Where’s the evidence?
• Do I believe this because I’ve thought it through myself, or because someone told me?
• Has it been built on the remarks of people in my early life, such as my parents, siblings, teachers, peer group, media figures, etc?
• How sure am I I’ve got it right?
• What will be the long-term cost if I don’t give up this belief?
• What will be the long-term benefits of letting go of this belief?
• What alternative belief(s) would serve me better?

124 Take the beliefs you identified in 120 to 122.

• Examine each belief and dispute it using the questions in 123.
• Then quickly write six endings for each of these sentences:
  If this belief were really true…
  If this belief turned out to be false…

You’ll find this a very liberating experience.

125 A second way of challenging a redundant belief is to use Byron Katie’s method, which she labels ‘inquiry’. Her book Loving What Is is essential reading for anyone intending to move forward in their lives but finding themselves held back by restrictive beliefs.

Byron Katie claims that the main cause of unhappiness is allowing our thoughts to argue with reality. Wanting other people or the world to be different to how they are, she points out, is like trying to teach a cat to bark – stressful, frustrating and futile.

Thoughts which argue with reality are often characterised by the words ‘should’ and ‘shouldn’t’.

• ‘It shouldn’t be allowed.’
• ‘People should be kinder to each other.’
• ‘Children should have more respect for their elders.’
• ‘Life should be fairer.’
• ‘People shouldn’t smoke.’
• ‘They (politicians, the authorities, etc) should do something about it.’

What do all these sentences have in common? They’re all hoping someone else changes, and who says they should? Wouldn’t it be better to focus your attention on things you can change – your own attitudes and beliefs, actions and words – rather than those you can ‘t ?

126 The inquiry method involves:

• 1Writing down the belief into which you wish to inquire.
• 2Asking these four questions:
  • Is it true?
  • Can you absolutely know that it’s true?
  • How do you react when you think that thought?
  • Who would you be without the thought?
• 3Turning it around.
  • If your belief involves another person, put your own name instead of theirs.
  • Or try the extreme opposite – e.g. turn should into shouldn’t.

Example

Belief: ‘I got passed over for promotion yet again. My boss obviously doesn’t like me.’

The four questions:

• 1Is it true that your boss doesn’t like you? (You probably think the answer is ‘yes’, but is there any evidence? What have they said or done that gives you that impression?)
• 2Can you absolutely know that it’s true? (Can you ever get inside the head of another human being and read their thoughts? Is there an implied ‘should’ in your thinking, i.e. ‘my boss should like me’?)
• 3How do you react when you think that thought? Happy? Optimistic? I bet you don’t. Can you see a reason to drop the thought? Can you find a stress-free reason to keep the thought? Is the reason peaceful, or stressful? (Hanging on to a belief that argues with reality is always stressful. It muddies your thinking and reduces your efficiency.)
• 4Who (or what) would you be without the thought? (Usually more contented, more peaceful and more capable.)
  Turn the underlying belief around. For example:

• Who (or what) would you be without the thought? (Usually more contented, more peaceful and more capable.)
  Turn the underlying belief around. For example:

The turnaround is not intended to be a literal statement of truth, but an alternative way of looking at the belief which may throw some interesting new light on the matter. Perhaps you were passed over for promotion because there were others more suitable, your boss sensed that you didn’t like them and responded, or because you’ve been underperforming. Now you’re getting down to the real cause, which you can do something to rectify.

127 Take the limiting beliefs you identified in 120–122 and apply the inquiry method.

Then ask yourself:

• How do you feel about these beliefs now?
• What does this tell you about yourself?

128 You already have the key to attitude change – the ITIA formula.

• 1Clarify your intentions and set goals. Which attitudes would you like to drop? Which do you intend to develop?
• 2Change your way of thinking. Be aware of your self-talk, the questions you ask yourself and your fundamental beliefs. What will you say to yourself now you have a new attitude? How will it be different?
• 3Make full use of your creative imagination and intuition (see from page 89). Imagine what it is like to have a totally positive attitude. Imagine the difference it would make to your life. Imprint your new attitudes on your subconscious mind.
• 4Act as if your new attitudes are already part of you. Behaviour reinforces the mental change. Overcome any idea that you can’t do a thing by simply starting to do it, then keep on doing it until it becomes a habit.

These four steps reinforce each other, providing you do all four and keep at it.

129 Taking control: you can do little to change your gender, your race, your age, your height, the colour of your eyes, your shoe size and so on… but you can change your attitude to these and your way of dealing with any prejudice in others.

You have limited possibilities of transforming society generally, the government, your company/organisation (unless you own it!), and the way others (including your nearest and dearest) behave… but you can change your attitude to these, by updating your information about them and being alert to changes.

You cannot change the past… but you can change your attitude to it, including your childhood experiences, past successes, failures and misfortunes by seeing them as valuable opportunities for learning and growth.

130 Answer honestly:

• 1Are you usually optimistic? Do you usually expect things to work out well?
• 2Or are you a pessimist?
• 3Do you usually expect the best of other people?
• 4How do you react when things go badly?
• 5How do you react when things go well?
• 6Do you tend to blame ‘bad luck’ or others for your misfortunes?
• 7Do you generally like other people?
• 8Do you resent people who are more successful than you?

131 Ten empowering attitudes and beliefs:

• 1I am responsible for my actions and creating the results I want in my life.
• 2I am confident without being arrogant or aggressive.
• 3I look for the good in every situation.
• 4I am the sort of person who always finds a way through.
• 5I have a strong belief in my own purpose.
• 6I like people.
• 7Life is here to be enjoyed.
• 8Good people like me can succeed and be prosperous.
• 9I am grateful for all the good in my life.
• 10I’m good enough to have the life I want. I deserve to be happy.

Make a plan for instilling these attitudes and beliefs into yourself.

132 No matter how hard we try, we are all influenced by our environment. Others’ attitudes rub off on us, and it’s impossible to maintain an upbeat, affirmative attitude if you are constantly around people who are the opposite. Books, TV programmes and even the type of music we listen to all have an effect.

Get into the habit of mixing with go ahead, successful people. Choose optimistic friends, read uplifting books, listen to motivational audio programmes and seek out joyful, inspirational movies.

133 The three types of expectation that most affect our lives are:

• 1Those our parents had (or have – it’s not unusual for people in middle age to be still governed by their parents’ expectations) of us, which can have a dramatic effect on how we feel about ourselves today. Many successful people would not have achieved what they did if they’d been swayed by the run of the mill expectations their parents had of them.
• 2Those we have of others, especially our children and friends and colleagues who look up to us. They can be very sensitive to our expectations of them.
• 3The expectations we have of ourselves. Some people believe it’s better to expect less, then they won’t be disappointed. These people usually under-achieve and it’s not difficult to see why.

Make a list of expectations that have shaped your life. Can you identify where they came from? Did they restrict or broaden you? Spend some time on this – bringing negative expectations out into the open helps you work them through and turn them around.

134 Think of a recent situation where your negative expectations came true. What happened? What could you have done differently?

135 Think of something you have attempted recently where results didn’t come up to your expectations.

Why was this? Was it because your expectations were too high? What could you have done to change the result?

Now think of something you have attempted recently where results were excellent. Why was this? What did you do differently? If you had taken the same approach to the first task (where results were disappointing) what effect would this have had on the outcome?

136 Create a new habit: expect the best each day. Programme your mind from the moment you awake with positive thoughts and mental images. Be mindful of your every waking expectation.

Remind yourself that what you do and say helps shape your expectations. Focus your attention on what you want and affirm that you have it. And never, never give up.

137 How well developed are your intuitive powers?

• 1Have you ever guessed what was in a letter before opening it, and been proved right?
• 2Are you good at guessing games?
• 3Do you accurately weigh up people when you meet them for the first time?
• 4Do you instinctively know when something is going to work or not?
• 5Do you ever wake up with the answer to something that has been bothering you?

Answer ‘yes’ to more than three of these questions, and your intuition is already highly developed, but don’t worry if you scored less than this – your intuitive powers are there, waiting to be developed. You probably don’t yet fully trust them.

138 To fully understand intuition, it is necessary to understand something of the workings of the brain. The brain has two hemispheres, left and right, connected by a network of tissue known as the corpus callosum. In broad terms, left brain activity is related to logical thinking and intelligence, and right brain activity to intuition, inspiration and emotion.

Some characteristics of the two hemispheres are shown below:

Most people have a tendency to favour one side or the other, but much of the time we alternate between the two – women more so than men.

Coming up with new ideas is mainly a right brain function; evaluating and developing these ideas is a left brain task. Sometimes (e.g. creative writing, composing music, painting) you switch between left and right brains so quickly that you cannot tell which is being used. We usually receive only the germ of an idea from the right brain and have to use our left to develop it and bring it to fruition. When both sides are working in harmony, your brain is operating at its optimum.

139 Study the list of left and right brain characteristics above. With which are you more comfortable – left brain activity? Right brain activity? Both equally? Or not sure?

If you are predominantly left-brained, spend more time on activities which utilise the right brain. Choose something you enjoy – painting, drawing, dancing, music, walking in the country, or play games like Pictionary, Guesstures, etc. While doing so, stay focused on the present moment and avoid analytical thoughts.

If predominantly right-brained, spend more time on activities that develop the left brain. Play word games like Lexicon or Scrabble, and numbers and logic games like bridge, Monopoly, backgammon and chess.

140 Developing your intuition: your intuitive and creative facilities are housed in the brain’s right hemisphere. You can access them by learning to control the pattern of your brain waves, which is achieved by relaxing the physical body and calming the mind.

Scientists have defined four areas of brain wave activity. In the normal waking state the brain vibrates at between 14 and 40 cycles per second (cps). This is the beta state. The average alert person produces brain waves at around 20 cps, but it can increase to 25 or more if the person is emotionally aroused. Excessive levels of brain activity can produce over-excitability, poor concentration and feelings of panic.

Between 8 and 13 cps is a zone of relaxation, a dreamy state on the boundary of waking and sleeping. This is the alpha level. Here, the two halves of the brain are in equilibrium. Most people learn to experience this with their eyes closed.

When we enjoy a deep, comfortable sleep, the brain’s activity slows to 5–7 cps (theta state). Below this is the delta state, the zone of total unconsciousness (coma).

The most important of these is the alpha state. Here, you can deliberately and effectively influence your subconscious thinking patterns and access your creative potential. Achieving this restful state is an invaluable skill. The key is spending regular time in relaxation.

141 Deep relaxation: the ability to relax can be learned quickly and easily. Here is a quick and simple method. (If you have difficulty relaxing, I suggest you purchase one of the many excellent relaxation tapes available.)

• 1Find a time and a place where you will not be disturbed. Start by making yourself warm and comfortable, seated or lying down. Uncross your legs and rest your hands in your lap. If you prefer to listen to music, choose something slow and calming. Take your attention to your breath.
• 2Fix your gaze on a spot across the room or on the ceiling. When your eyes start to tire, count five deep breaths backwards. With each breath, allow your eyes to close a little. When you get to one, close them.
• 3Now take your attention to each group of muscles in turn and allow them to relax. Either start with your toes and feet, calves and ankles, thighs, etc and work up, or start with the top of your head and work down through the face, neck and shoulders, arms and hands and so on.
• 4To deepen the relaxation, slowly count down from ten to one on each out breath. As you do so, imagine yourself descending a flight of steps. When you get to the bottom, imagine yourself in a comfortable relaxing place, such as a garden, a beach or a special sanctuary.
• 5When you are deeply relaxed, think ‘zero’. Then repeat the following affirmation slowly to yourself: ‘I relax easily, quickly and deeply. Each time I relax, I go deeper and deeper. I am at peace.’

142 Sleeping on it: it helps to sleep on a decision before making your final preference. The subconscious is like a computer, able to sort through complex ideas without your conscious state interfering. It works for you 24 hours a day, including when you are asleep.

If you are struggling with a difficult decision, ask your intuition to help. As you’re dozing off to sleep, focus on a problem or question, and ask your intuition to reveal the answer to you. Keep a pen and paper by your bedside so you can write down any answers immediately, otherwise you may not remember in the morning.

You will frequently wake up clear about what to do.

143 Problem solving: write down the problem and examine it carefully so that you fully understand it. Ask yourself, ‘What’s stopping me from solving the problem? How can I get rid of the blockages?’ Deal with those if you can.

Next, write down all the solutions that you can think of. What seems to be the best solution? Try it out.

So far, you’ve mainly used your left brain. If this doesn’t work, relax into the alpha state and ask your intuition to help. The answer may not come there and then, but sooner or later it will. Often it will pop into your head in the most unexpected moment. Expect a solution and keep your wits about you so you don’t ignore it when it comes – intuitive answers often seem simpler and wiser than normal thinking.

144 Sitting for ideas: use this method whenever you need some inspiration. Take a half-formed idea and examine it closely. Think about it, research it, and formulate some key questions (intuition usually works best when you have gathered plenty of facts and sorted through the information). Have a notebook and pencil ready.

Sit patiently in a darkened room for an hour or so, asking for the answers to pop into your head. (Many brilliant insights and ideas simply popped into someone’s head unexpectedly.) Jot down any ideas that come to you before you leave the room.

145 Ask a higher power for guidance: pretend you are asking for help from a higher power. (If you believe in a higher power you’ll have no need to pretend.) Use a question and answer format. Ask a question on which you need advice, then listen carefully. Have a pen and paper ready and write down anything that comes to you. You can do this any time you need quick guidance or relief in stressful situations.

146 Mind mapping™ is a technique popularised by Tony Buzan (the mind map™ is a registered trade mark of the Buzan organisation). It is a graphical technique for generating and sifting through ideas. It reflects the way the brain works by utilising both left and right hemispheres.

Take a large piece of paper. Write the topic of interest in the centre and ask your mind for ideas. Each main theme is plotted like a branch spreading out from the centre. Each sub-theme is plotted like a minor branch. Eventually the page is filled with ideas (see example below).

Mind maps™ can be used for many purposes, including note taking, note making, revision and structuring ideas.

I used them to plan this book and structure each chapter. One of my initial mind maps is reproduced in the example.

To draw a mind map™:

• 1Take a large piece of plain paper. Turn it on its side (landscape). Have to hand a set of coloured pens.
• 2Write or draw your central idea (using pictures of diagrams is a good idea, since the right brain brings these into play) in the middle of the page.
• 3Add the main branches using key words or images. Use colour. If you can draw a picture that represents an idea, do so.
• 4Add more detail in the form of sub-branches, with more key words and images.
• 5Make your mind map™ as pleasing to the eye as possible.
• 6When you are sure you've exhausted every idea, use arrows to connect ideas that are linked in some way.

The example opposite shows the mind map™ I used (in black and white; the original was in colour) when initially planning the contents of this book. As you can see, the final result was slightly different from these first thoughts, but, as with most mind maps, it was a useful starting point.

147 To heighten your intuitive and creative senses:

• 1Notice what inspires and uplifts you and deliberately bring more of it into your life. For instance, if you like dancing, go dancing more; if you enjoy nature, go for a walk in natural surroundings regularly.
• 2Seek out more inspiring situations.
• 3Every day, do things that enthuse and stimulate you.
• 4Spend more time around creative and inspirational people – it will rub off on you.

148 How to recognise your intuition: intuition works in subtle ways. Usually it reveals itself quietly. Sometimes it makes itself known in a dream. Many dreams are of little consequence – they are simply your subconscious cleaning out the mental cobwebs while you sleep – but a memorable or recurring dream may be a sign that your intuition is trying to get through to you.

The best way to recognise your intuition is to ask yourself, ‘Does this feel right in my gut’ (intuition is often called ‘gut feel’).

Also, take note of the first feeling or flash of thought. We initially experience something as a physical feeling a split second before we intellectualise about it. The first response is usually the most reliable because the left brain has not yet had time to come up with a conditioned response.

In general, the stronger the feeling of fulfilment and contentment, the more likely it is to be your intuition.

149 Trust your instincts. Intuitive perception is rarely wrong. You subconsciously gather all sorts of ideas and information which fuel your intuition. You won’t even be aware of most of it – that’s why we call it subconscious. Talk to people who’ve made good decisions and they’ll often tell you they don’t really know why they did what they did, it just felt right.

Sometimes the rational mind suggests one thing and intuition the other. You’re not sure which to follow. Find out what you need to know, make a decision, then ask your intuition if it is correct. If your deepest self turns against it, don’t do it.

The more you tune in to your intuition and rely on it, the better it works for you.

150 Everything that has ever been created by a human being originated as a mental image in someone’s imagination. This was then made real through a combination of ingenuity, clear thinking and physical effort. We are what and where we are because we have first imagined it.

Time spent imagining your perfect future is never wasted, because anything your mind can envisage can be materialised. Choose to see yourself as a happy, successful, healthy and gifted person. When you think, imagine, talk and behave like the person you want to be, you will become that person. There is no obstruction other than a ‘can’t’ way of thinking.

151 You may not always be aware of them, but you are continually making pictures in your mind. These pictures have a favourable effect if they are positive (and, in contrast, a harmful effect if they are negative). Napolean Hill recognised this in his groundbreaking book, Think and Grow Rich. He wrote, ‘What the mind can conceive, the will can achieve.’

That’s why top sportsmen and women use creative imagery and autosuggestion to help them win trophies and break world records; business executives use them to help make better sales presentations and gain promotion; leading doctors teach patients to relieve painful symptoms and even rid themselves of serious diseases, including cancer, arthritis and heart disease, using these techniques; and psychotherapists use them to help their clients overcome a wide range of emotional problems using them, including fears and phobias, panic attacks, eliminating unwanted habits, stress and lack of confidence.

Become aware of the pictures in your mind. Some of these will be fleeting, others more long-lasting.

152 Think about your ideal life. What does it look like, feel and sound like? Imagine the way you want to live, the people you want to mix with, your work, your home, the lifestyle you desire, your hobbies and interests and so on. Create a vision.

Don’t worry at this stage about the details – just outline your ideal life so you can begin to acquire the habit of believing it's possible.

Make some notes in your Self-Coaching Journal. Do it right now. Remember, life’s too short to fritter on activities that don’t fulfil you and you don’t enjoy.

153 Imagine yourself five years from now, having accomplished a major goal.

Ask yourself:

• What does it look like?
• How does it feel?
• What will have had to happen to me to be there?
• What will I have had to have done for me to be there?
• What steps will I have to have completed?

Now slowly move back in time, three years from now, two years, one year, six months, three months, one month, reviewing each successive step until you come back to today.

Write down some thoughts about this exercise in your Self-Coaching Journal.

154 Before you use these techniques, make sure your intentions are clear. Decide on the contents of each session in advance. Creative imagery is powerful, but if unfocused can inadvertently do more harm than good.

If you have difficulty remembering your routine, record it onto a cassette tape or write it down and ask a friend to read it to you slowly.

155 Make time every day – preferably twice a day. The best times are first thing in the morning when, as you awaken, you are naturally in alpha, and in those twilight moments just before you drop off to sleep. Your last few thoughts and mental images of the day have a huge impact on your subconscious and may influence your dreams.

156 Relax your body and calm the mind. Sit or lie quietly, close your eyes and imagine you have a mental screen inside your forehead, just above eye level. Use this to create the images you want. Let your mind wander to relaxing feelings and images, but don't force it; this is a very passive process. Allow your chosen images to materialise. Too much effort can be self-defeating.

157 Use all five senses as much as possible. Create visual images and try to make any sounds, textures, smells and feelings as clear and distinct as you can.

If you have difficulty visualising, don’t worry, you’re not alone and you will improve with practise. Start by picking a scene you know well, perhaps your home or garden. Close your eyes and think of a small part of it – a tree, the front door or a window. Let an image materialise. If it doesn’t, pretend you can see it. Then open your eyes, pause a few seconds, close them and try again. Can you see it?

Make your imagination come alive. Place the images in the middle of your mental screen, and use colour, brightness and movement.

158 Imagine the scene as you would experience it through your own senses, not as an onlooker. For example, if you want to be an actor, imagine yourself looking out at the audience from the stage. Smell the greasepaint, feel the boards beneath your feet, and hear the words projecting from your mouth just as you would as if you were speaking them.

159 Concentrate on yourself making a success of what you’re doing. This is what you want to imprint on your subconscious.

For example, if your goal is to win the cup at the local tennis club, ‘see’ yourself holding the cup, milking the applause. Once they have registered in your subconscious, your habits (of thought and action) will automatically adjust themselves to bring your mental images into reality. Conjure up as much upbeat emotion as you can. The more feeling you put into it, the better.

160 Enhance your creative imagery with autosuggestion. Choose suitable suggestions, such as:

• Every day in every way I get closer and closer to achieving my goal.
• I only think about and visualise what I want to happen.
• I am worthy of all the good in my life. I deserve the best.
• I think, talk and act confidently at all times.
• I believe in myself. I can do anything I choose.
• I am successful in everything I do.

161 Practise. The more often you use creative imagery, the easier it gets. Use it daily even if you can only spare a few minutes. Frequent short sessions are better than long, irregular sessions.

Now take action. Creative imagery smoothes the way to success, providing you do what has to be done. But don’t expect too much all at once. If nothing seems to happen for a while, don’t give up. Lasting change takes time, patience and persistence.

162 Choose something you want for yourself and practise using creative imagery every day.

Start with something small. After a month, review your progress. What’s changed? How close are you to your goal? Have you achieved it? How do you feel? How well has creative imagery worked for you? What more do you need to do?

163 The manifestation technique is a potent way of bringing together the power of intention, positive thinking, creative imagery and goal-directed action.

• 1Start by drawing a line down the centre of a large sheet of paper. Head the left side ‘Reasons why I want…’ (a car, house, job, personal quality, loving relationship or whatever it may be).
• 2Head the right side ‘Specific details of my…’
• 3Now list all the reasons why you want it in the left column; on the right side, opposite each reason, list precisely what you want. The more specific, the better.

For example, let’s suppose you have set your heart on a new house:

• 4You now have two detailed columns with your requirements on the right reflecting the reasons on the left. Read through it a few times until you are clear about what you want and the image is etched on your mind. Write down some pertinent affirmations on a small card to carry with you.
• 5Now lie down or sit back, take a few deep breaths, close your eyes and relax. Imagine and affirm yourself with what you want, and feel deeply grateful for having the means to acquire it.
  For example, imagine your house as already yours. Picture it. ‘See’ yourself standing in the garden or sitting out on the patio. Smell the freshly mown lawn. Now turn the front door handle and enter your house. Imagine living there, feeling joyful. Feel grateful in advance for your goal being accomplished.
• 6Now do what needs to be done. Obviously your desires will not materialise out of thin air, but if you reinforce the mental images daily and avoid allowing doubts to creep in, your subconscious autopilot will not forget. You will be guided by your intuition, and if you believe in yourself, your wishes will come true.

Try the manifestation technique for yourself. (I used it last year when I needed a small car, and was given – yes, given – a perfectly adequate one that met my requirements by a complete stranger at a seminar. Strange but true!)

164 Mental rehearsal is the practice of running a forthcoming event through in your mind in advance. It helps you do better on the day.

It’s simple. When you face an anxiety provoking situation, spend a few minutes each day leading up to the event to relax and make a clear image of yourself completely calm and in control. For example, say you had a driving test a fortnight from now. Every day for the next two weeks, mentally rehearse the test. ‘See’, ‘feel’ and ‘hear’ yourself going through the test, culminating in the examiner congratulating you and handing you your pass slip. If you did this daily, by the time the test arrived you would be confident and at ease, and much more likely to pass.

Dr Roger Bannister used mental rehearsal to prepare himself for his attempt on the four minute mile. When a journalist asked him how he felt as he rounded the final bend with the world record within reach, he said he’d felt perfectly calm. ‘I’d done it so many times in my mind,' he said, ‘I just had a feeling of déjà vu.’

Try it. Use mental rehearsal to prepare yourself for a forthcoming situation. Choose one you don’t normally handle well. Go through the entire event in advance in your mind. See yourself going through every step exactly as you would like to do it in reality, affirming that you are successful and achieving your desired outcome. Once you've tasted the benefits, you’ll want to use the technique often.

165 Anchoring: an ‘anchor’ is any stimulus that triggers an emotional response. It could be a piece of music that evokes happy or sad memories for you, a visit to a favourite place, or a photograph of someone who you care about. Anchoring provides a short cut to positive feelings at any time: your emotionally-charged memories become a powerful resource to help change your emotional state at will.

This is how: let’s say you need to make a sales call and you’re feeling nervous. Relax into alpha. Take your mind back to a time when you felt really confident. (If one doesn’t come to mind, just pretend you feel confident – your subconscious mind won’t know the difference.)

When the feeling is really strong, tighten your fist and say the words ‘Yes! I can!’ (Any suitable gesture or phrase is just as good, provided that it is not one you use habitually.) Then tell yourself that every time you do this you’ll experience those same powerful feelings all over again. This is called installing the anchor.

Just before the sales call, tighten your fist and repeat the chosen phrase. This is called ‘firing’ the anchor. You’ll feel all that confidence come flooding back. If you’ve never done it before, you’ll be amazed how effective it is.

The more you rehearse your anchor, the more successful you will be. Also, make sure those empowering feelings are really intense when you install it, because if you are feeling indifferent you will not succeed. Also, an anchor which has not been used for some time will lose its power and fade away. If you don’t use it, you may lose it!’

166 Install an anchor that you can use whenever you need confidence, and reinforce it several times a week. Choose any confident word, phrase or gesture that works for you.

Also install an anchor that you can use when you need to feel calm, and reinforce it several times a week. This time, choose a word, phrase or gesture that brings you peace and quiet composure.

167 The swish technique is another way of creating a powerful emotional state at will. It can be used to develop confidence, drive, enthusiasm, calmness, determination and so on. Let’s suppose you wish to grow in confidence:

• 1Think back to a time when you felt confident (there must be one – if not, imagine such a time). What stops you feeling like this normally?
• 2Now think of a time when you felt unsure of yourself. What made you feel that way? Was it within yourself, or something another person said or did?
• 3Break your concentration by looking at something around you or reciting your telephone number backwards.
• 4Next create an image of yourself a few minutes into the future, as someone with confidence, poise and high self-esteem. Make this image as vivid as possible, and ‘feel’ it as the truth. Say an affirmation, such as ‘I think, talk and act confidently at all times,’ or, ‘believe in myself. I can do anything I choose.’
• 5When the positive image is clear and firm, shrink it down to a glistening dot and put it in the middle of the negative image evoked. Let the dot grow until, with a loud ‘swish’ it blocks out and engulfs the negative image. Do this several times, letting the swish happen more and more quickly.
• 6When you are ready, try to recall the negative image. The positive should have replaced it, and you will be experiencing a shimmering cloud of good feelings all around you. If not, go back to step 5 and practise some more.

168 Now that you have learned several creative imagery techniques, ask yourself:

• What goal(s) could I achieve more quickly if I used creative imagery, mental rehearsal, anchoring and swish?
• How can I improve my use of these techniques?

169 Overcoming problems with creative imagery.

If you diligently set aside time for creative imagery and autosuggestion and nothing seems to happen, ask yourself the following questions:

• Do I really want this? Or am I fooling myself? (The more you want something, and the more you believe that it will be yours, the more likely you are to get it.)
• Am I being too impatient? Have I allowed sufficient time?
• Am I willing to do what needs to be done?
• Am I trying too hard? Am I trying to force it?
• Have I allowed doubts to creep in? (Doubt – especially self-doubt – takes you right back where you started.)

And remember: merely reading this book without applying what you learn won't accomplish anything at all.

170 The fourth part of the ITIA formula for permanent change is action. The secret is to behave as if you are already the person you most want to be; then, like a professional actor, you become that person.

Shakespeare, who was no mean psychologist, expressed this principle in simple terms when he wrote, ‘Assume a virtue if you have it not’. This is precisely what many successful people did when they first set out to tackle a challenging goal.

The ‘as if’ principle states that when you act ‘as if’ the changes you desire will happen and are already happening, they are inevitable. When you act as if success is inevitable, it invariably is. And if you behave in a confident way, whether you are feeling confident or not, people around you will believe in you, which will make it easier to believe in yourself, hence your confidence grows.

Many therapists use the ‘as if’ principle in their work with panic attack and phobia sufferers. They take clients with fear of heights to the top of tall buildings and encourage them to stay there until their anxiety subsides. They bring spiders progressively closer to arachnophobics until they are comfortable in their presence, and patients with social phobias are encouraged to mix with people in controlled settings until their panic diminishes.

These methods have been shown to help a considerable number of sufferers, and are even more effective when coupled with cognitive therapy (i.e. working with attitudes and beliefs) and creative imagery. There will be times as you progress towards your goals when a certain course of action seems too daunting and mental rehearsal alone is insufficient to take away the apprehension. At these times, you must simply grit your teeth, feel the fear and do it anyway. Change never feels right, but when you act ‘as if’, eventually the uncomfortable feelings die away.

171 Think of a personal attribute you would like to develop, such as assertiveness, patience, confidence, calmness or courage. Find out what people who have this trait do, and behave that way for a week. For example, if you are shy find out how outgoing people behave and do likewise. Make a special effort to shake hands firmly, look people in the eye, speak with a self-assured tone of voice and smile. Sooner or later your initial distress will diminish.

A touch of anxiety is part of the growth process. Consider the butterflies in your stomach to be nothing more than growing pains. Anxiety does not increase for ever, eventually it fades. (It fades much more quickly when backed up with a change of thinking and use of creative imagery.) Then the new behaviour becomes a natural part of you, and the very same mechanisms that once tried to prevent you from changing throw their weight behind the new way of being.

172 Early experiments on animals concluded that we are motivated simply by a ‘felt need’. For example, place a starving rat and a piece of cheese in a maze and it searches for the food. Repeat this daily, and the time taken to find the cheese diminishes until after a few days it will go straight through the maze to the cheese. The rat is motivated by a felt need, i.e. it is hungry, which induces stress, and its goal (the cheese).

Think about it – what, in life, is the ‘cheese’ for you?

173 Once a need or want is experienced, we face certain decisions. What is the best way of alleviating that need? How much effort would it take? Is it worth the effort? This leads us to the second point about motivation: the way we go about meeting a felt need depends on the amount of anticipated ‘pleasure’ or ‘pain’ that will result from any given action.

To return to the rat briefly, it knew from experience that eating relieves tension and is pleasurable, and that not eating causes discomfort (pain). Therefore, when hungry it is motivated to search for food. Once it has eaten, it is content to go back to sleep.

Look again at your list of goals. Differentiate between your real needs and wants, and superficial wants. Superficial wants don’t come from your inner self, and consequently don’t motivate.

Also remember – only an un satisfied need motivates.

174 We humans continually weigh up the choices available to us and choose those which appear to offer the most pleasure and cause the least pain. For example, if you were relaxing on a sunny beach after a good lunch, with no pressing engagements, you would probably be happy to stay for the whole afternoon. But, as mealtime approaches, you begin to feel restless until, like the rat, you head off in search of food.

Some people are more motivated by the desire to avoid pain (physical, mental or emotional) than to seek pleasure. Their principal style is ‘moving away’ motivation. Pain avoiders recall previously undesirable situations and try to avoid them happening again. They prefer to stay in their ‘comfort zones’ rather than risk striving for new challenges.

Sometimes it’s more a matter of avoidance tactics, for instance, teenagers who put off studying avoid the immediate ‘displeasure’ of work in order to enjoy the short term ‘pleasure’ of watching TV. Then as their exams approach, the prospect of failing looms large, so they choose the path which offers the least long-term pain and get stuck in.

The reverse is true for high achievers – they are nearly always attracted by the prospect of more ‘pleasure’, so they are willing to risk a little extra ‘pain’. Every time they succeed in finding their ‘cheese’, this behaviour is reinforced. Pleasure seekers focus on good experiences and try to hang on to them. This is ‘moving towards’ motivation.

Are you (by nature) a ‘pleasure seeker’ or ‘risk avoider’?

175 Research shows that the most powerful motivation comes from a combination of passion and purpose. These are derived from:

• 1A detailed and vivid image of what you want.
• 2Strong desire.
• 3A firm belief that you will be successful.

This is why clear goals, creative imagery (see pages 101–105) and positive beliefs and expectations are so important.

176 Moving away motivation. William was brought up in a deprived industrial area during the Great Depression of the 1920s and 30s. In his youth, tired and hungry after a 12 hour shift in a hot and steamy soap factory, he dragged his aching body to evening classes to gain additional qualifications before returning to the small family home with no bathroom and an outside toilet where he shared a bedroom with two brothers.

‘I couldn’t stand the prospect of spending the rest of my life in a factory,’ he said, ‘and I didn’t want my family to suffer as I had.’ He retired a prosperous man, living in a comfortable home in a leafy suburb.

Body Shop founder Anita Roddick was primarily concerned with rectifying a disagreeable situation – cruel animal experiments – when she started making her own cosmetics. Now, the Body Shop is an international business bringing joy to people around the world and Anita is a very wealthy woman. But it is still driven by the desire to fight cruelty to animals, promote justice and protect the environment.

Both William and Anita were driven by ‘moving away’ motivation. How about you?

177 Extrinsic motivation comes from outside. There are two main types:

• Fear motivation, e.g. a sergeant major in the army bullies and harasses new recruits to knock them into shape. Fear motivation is effective in the short term, but is short-lived.
• Incentive motivation, e.g. an employer offering a bonus for good performance, or a child receiving sweets for good behaviour. This is effective for a while but, like a drug, the amount and frequency of the incentive usually needs to be increased over time if motivation is to be maintained. Also, motivation can fade away if the incentive is withdrawn.

To what extent are you motivated by fear, incentives, or both?

178 Intrinsic motivation comes from within. It is impervious to the words and actions of others, therefore it is the most powerful type. Clear goals that come from within, a detailed and vivid image of what you want, strong desire and self-belief are the bases of strong intrinsic motivation. Without these you’re unlikely to have enough motivation to keep going when the going gets tough.

179 Intention: keep your goals very clearly etched in your mind. Remind yourself daily of your aims and commitment. Encourage yourself by keeping a physical symbol of your goals in sight. If it’s a material object you’re after, carry a photograph with you, if a personal development goal, something that symbolises its achievement.

Don’t rest on your laurels. Once you’ve achieved a goal – set some more. Keep the momentum going. Without goals you lose your drive, direction and inspiration.

180 Thought: the more positive your thinking, the more likely you are to succeed. Affirm daily, aloud, that you can and will achieve your goals. Challenge any disempowering beliefs. Be careful to ask yourself only purposeful questions.

181 Imagination: imprint your desires – and the belief that they will come true – on your subconscious mind daily. Every morning and evening – and at frequent intervals in between – imagine yourself in clear detail accomplishing your goals, and use mental rehearsal, anchoring and swish when appropriate.

182 Do something every day towards your goals. Not only does this take you closer to them, but also helps to keep them in mind. Keep a ‘to do’ list and update it continually (see pages 160–162 on time management). Monitor your progress and make adjustments if necessary and, above all, keep going.

If it feels awkward, ignore the discomfort, feel the fear and do it anyway. Change never feels right, but when you act ‘as if’, over time the unpleasant feelings grow fainter and die away.

183 Celebrate your progress. Each time you reach a major stepping stone, give yourself a pat on the back. Treat yourself to something special – a lavish meal, an outing to somewhere special, a massage, sauna, whatever you fancy. Having something to look forward to when you reach a significant milestone is very motivating. Record your thoughts in your Self-Coaching Journal.

If things don’t work out as planned, reflect on what you’ve learned and put it all down to experience. Whatever you do, don’t castigate yourself. Instead, reaffirm your commitment and keep going.

184 If you’ve tried your hardest and you still find it hard to stay motivated, it may be that the goal(s) you are chasing is not right for you. You may, for instance, have drawn the wrong conclusions, listened to the wrong people, or misinterpreted your intuition. If you suspect this may be the case, re-examine your goals. Go back to the section on discovering your purpose (pages 34–36) and work through the process again.