Counsellors keep developing by the guidance and insights they receive from fruitful supervision.

When the patient has no hope of his own, he may need to
borrow some from the therapist to keep himself going. And
when the therapist is losing hope, he may need to borrow some
from colleagues.

(Sharon Klayman Farber, 2002:369)

Regular supervision is considered to be an essential element in the personal development of a counsellor. It ensures that counsellors work ethically and competently, and serves as a safeguard for counsellors (and indirectly their clients) should counsellors experience difficulties in their work, or need to discuss their concerns about a particular client – for example, a suicidal client.

What is supervision?

A good supervisory relationship is the best way we know to ensure that we stay open to ourselves and our clients.

(Hawkins and Shohet, 1989:157)

The function of the supervisor is to help counsellors to increase their skills and develop the understanding of their own and their clients’ feelings in such a way as to increase their sensitivity and awareness. While this relationship is concerned with the emotional development of the counsellor, the focus is not therapy for the counsellor. The counsellor will normally be in a therapeutic relationship with someone else. Thus the task of the mentor differs from that of the counsellor, falling between the polarities of counselling and tutoring.

Increasing your self-understanding

For counselling to be productive counsellors must be continually moving forward towards increased understanding of themselves in relation to other people.

Time and again they will be brought into contact with clients whose problems will awaken within them something which will create resistance or conflict within that relationship and specific to it. The client’s difficulty will not be adequately resolved until the counsellor’s own resistance or conflict is resolved. It is true that the client may seek help from other sources, but if so, the counsellor’s personal development may be retarded. When faced with a situation where our own emotions are thrown into turmoil, or where counselling appears to have reached stalemate, there are three courses of action the counsellor may take. We can pull the blanket over our head and hope that the problem will go away; we can work at it on our own or we can seek help.

In counselling we hope that the client will achieve a degree of insight so that he can see his problem more realistically. If insight is essential for the client, how much more is it essential for the counsellor? If it is necessary for the client to seek help from someone to work through his problem (if he had been able to work it out for himself, surely he would), it is equally important for the counsellor. There is an element of truth in what people say: that one must have experienced something before one can really help others. This does not mean that the counsellor must have been through an identical experience, but it is important that every person who engages in counselling has been the recipient in a helping relationship.

Making the most of the help available

Many people who counsel have personal experience of what it is like to be a client, and it has been this experience that has prompted them to become counsellors.

Not everyone has had this first-hand experience and yet it is possible to experience similar feelings when it becomes necessary to seek the help of a mentor during counselling.

The person in need of counselling has probably put off seeking help and has tried to work it out for himself, but to no avail – the problem is still there. He is bound to feel inadequate; that he should have been able to manage. He may think, ‘Can this other person really help?’

The counsellor may experience similar feelings when it is obvious that the counselling relationship has turned sour; that the client is being difficult, resistant, hostile or whatever, or just simply that movement seems to have stopped.

It is no easier for the counsellor in this position to go to someone else for help than it was for the client to approach the counsellor in the first instance. At that stage counsellors, in their heart, come near to knowing how their clients feel. We may resist it and rebel against it, but only if we submit to this experience, when it becomes necessary, will our counselling once more assume accurate empathy.

Understanding the supervisor’s role in counselling

Supervisors will assist counsellors to resolve the difficulty that has arisen between themselves and their clients, mainly because the mentor can stand outside and explore with the counsellor what is happening with the client, the counsellor and the relationship between counsellor and client.

The supervisor will be able to use what happens within the supervisory relationship to point to what may be happening between the counsellor and the client. This is similar to the way in which the counsellor may be able to point out to clients that what happens between them may be similar to what happens between the clients and other people.

For the counsellor who has such a supervisory relationship the potential for personal awareness is infinite. Counsellors who choose to disregard such a relationship will lose out and run the risk of eventually becoming ineffective in their counselling.

The essence of the supervisory relationship is simple:

I proceed with a case of counselling and, on a regular basis, report back to another counsellor with whom I discuss what transpired in the counselling of the client and how the supervisory relationship affects me personally.

Components of the supervisory relationship

• To support and encourage the counsellor.
• To teach the counsellor to integrate theoretical knowledge and practice.
• To assess the maintenance of standards.
• To transmit professional values and ethics.
• To help the counsellor develop through insight.
• To enable the counsellor to develop skills and build self-confidence.
• To enable the counsellor to share vulnerabilities, disappointments and to be aware of his limitations.
• To help the counsellor move forward with a client if she feels stuck.
• To enable the counsellor to evaluate his work and effectiveness.
• To share ideas and explore different counselling approaches.
• To report on the client’s progress or lack of progress.
• To recharge the counsellor’s batteries.

Three approaches to supervision

1. Focus on the case: characteristics of this approach

a) Exploration of case material.

b) Concentrated mainly on what took place, with little, if any, exploration of the counsellor’s feelings.

c) Little exploration of the counselling relationship.

d) A teacher/pupil relationship.

e) Discussion is more in the ‘then-and-there’, than in the ‘here-and-now’.

This approach may create a relationship of the expert and the novice who seeks to please. Because there is often a climate of criticism in this case-centred style of supervision there may be a tendency for the counsellor to skate over the events he is ashamed of or doubtful about revealing – so there may be an ‘evasion factor’ in the discussion.

2. Focus on the counsellor: characteristics of this approach

a) The counselling relationship and what is happening within the counsellor.

b) Feelings are more readily acknowledged.

c) Carried out in an uncritical atmosphere.

The belief that underpins this approach is that learning is only meaningful if it is personal, so it is advocated that links are made between situations in casework and the counsellor’s own personal circumstances. With this approach, the counsellor is likely to feel less criticised and so more supported and thus the ability to learn from the teaching offered may be greater.

3. Focus on the interaction: characteristics of this approach

a) Takes into account both the case and the counselling relationship.

b) The interaction between client and counsellor may, in some way, be reflected in the supervisor relationship. Recognising the interaction, and working with it, is likely to provide the counsellor with invaluable first-hand experience.

The key to this interactive approach is that the counsellor’s behaviour with the case is not taken up directly, but is always in relation to what the client might be doing to them. The interactive supervisor knows that the counsellor normally manages his cases thoughtfully and assumes, therefore, what has happened tells him something about the dynamics of the case. Clearly not everything a counsellor does is a reflection of the case, and the supervisor would need to draw attention to how the counsellor is using defences to avoid dealing with a particular issue. Perhaps in certain circumstances he or she might even suggest therapy elsewhere to help, but would not deal with the problem personally.

For details of useful books on supervision see Further Reading.

To effectively communicate, we must realise that we are all different
in the way we perceive the world and use this understanding as a
guide to our communication with others.

                   Anthony Robbins

Drawing the threads together

A great deal of work goes into writing a book, and even more in creating a new edition, yet within that there is valuable experience, at least it has been so for us. Counselling is not just learning a technique; it is about one’s self. Every client brings new opportunities for self-discovery and self-awareness. The aim of writing a book like this is to share knowledge and experience, to help the reader take one more step along the road toward greater self-awareness. That is why we hope this book has been challenging for you. In counselling we try to hold up a mirror to the client as we do in this book. We hope that you will have been encouraged by what the mirror revealed, that you are a worthwhile person, and that you have a lot to offer other people as you engage in this wonderful relationship called counselling. If anything we have said has challenged you and has led to increased awareness and insight then we are delighted.

Our sincere hope is that this book will inspire you to take your counselling training further, but above all, that you will have travelled a bit further along the never-ending and stimulating road of learning to counsel.

The journey is the reward.

                     Chinese proverb